adrian1203

Today, I realised the only preparation I've done for my final French exam has been wanking off to French porn. FML

Today, I found out that my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I have in our last year of marriage. FML

Today, my girlfriend texted me saying, "I have some Durex and want your help" so I rushed to her house. She had meant to say "Dulux". I had to help her paint her bedroom. FML

Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "A whore." FML