eszterj

Today, I witnessed a series of nude old people cycling in the city. I was eating. FML

Today, I was talking to my crush on MSN. She was telling me how her friend had passed away recently. I had two chats open and accidentally replied, "That's hilarious." FML

Today, I asked my boyfriend if my ass looked big in my new jeans. He looked, and then started singing "I like big butts and I cannot lie". FML

Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML

Today, I realised after showering that I didn't have a towel, so I thought I would risk a naked dash to my brother's room to steal one of his. He and his friend were in the room and both agreed that I needed a "trim". FML

Today, I lost a bet with my grandma, and now she's coming with me on my next date. FML

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. They thought it would be funny to pretend that they're nudists. FML