Monsieur Jakarta, Indonesia Célibataire
Today, it's my birthday, and my present is that my mom is coming over to see me so that she can borrow three hundred dollars. FML
Today, I found out that my grandma has been sending me birthday money every year. My mom just steals it before I ever see it. FML
Today, I got circumcised by my zipper. FML
Today, I won the lottery. My ex-girlfriend has the ticket. I just broke up with her. FML
Today, I got motion sickness while having sex. FML
Today, the only positive thing my ex boyfriend left me was my pregnancy test. FML
Today, my ex husband is marrying my sister. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. When I got there, I found out that the guy was a ventriloquist and was going to use his puppet to talk to me. FML
Today, my boss contacted me to come in for a quick meeting. I drove 30 minutes to get to work only to find out she was firing me and wanted my key card back. FML
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