Sarah_Marie93

Today, I found out that my husband named our daughter after his favorite porn star. FML

Today, I found out the reason I've been itchy for the last two weeks is because I'm now allergic to chlorine. I'm also a swimming instructor. FML

Hello?

Today, I lost my cat. It's deaf, so no matter what I do it can't hear me. FML

Today, I had to take a dump in a box for a stool test. FML

Today, my 12 year-old daughter asked me where her scrotum is. FML

Today, my dog climbed onto the dining room table to eat the cat's food. Then whined until I showed him how to get down. He does this every night. My dog is a genius. FML