Today, my boyfriend invited me over to "play with his lizard." After excitedly rushing across town, I realized this wasn't a euphemism, he actually bought an Iguana. FML
Today, at work, I was talking to a Scottish woman when my coworker and I both told her we were also Scottish. To this she replied, "We Scottish people get around." I then said, "Tell me about it, I'm one of four siblings from my dad, he definitely gets around." She was talking about travel. FML
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