_irisvargas

How romantic

Today, my boyfriend bought me some feminine cleansing wipes for my birthday so I could, "get the hoo-ha spick-and-span." FML

Today, my husband shaved off his beard. Turns out he looks like my ex. FML

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

Today, I found out my Nan passed away. My boyfriend came over to comfort me, things got intimate and we ended up having sex. After he came, he chuckled to himself and said, "That one's for you, Nan". FML

Today, I blew my load in less than a minute. I wasn't having sex or even making out. I was spooning. FML

Today, my boyfriend told me he didn't feel attractive. I tried to cheer him up by telling him that I find him very attractive, and so do my friends. He said that didn't matter, because my friends and I aren't attractive either. FML