modelos10

Today, my girlfriend freaked out, thinking she might be pregnant due to her period being late. I found myself reminding her that one actually has to have had sex recently to become pregnant. We've been living together, sexless, for over a year. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the doctor's for an ultrasound, as I'm 7 months pregnant. Then he went home and took his wife out to dinner for her birthday. FML

Muddy

Today, my dad decided to clean his muddy shoes right beside me by clapping them together, causing mud to fly all over me. This wouldn't have been a problem had I not been wearing my white wedding dress just before getting married. FML

Today, in the middle of telling my mother about my engagement, she suddenly broke down in tears about her problems at work and her loveless marriage, and abruptly hung up on me. FML

Today, I broke up with my psycho girlfriend of one month. She actually expected me to let her keep the vintage car that I've been rebuilding for the past two years, and when I refused, she threatened to burn my garage down with us still in it. FML