Monsieur 30 ans Célibataire
Today, I have to pack for tomorrow's family vacation. For one week I get to be stuck in a one bedroom cabin with my alcoholic father, bipolar mother, and two much younger siblings who have a passion for screaming. FML
Today, I found out that the guy I like was only coming to my house to get closer to my brother. FML
Today, I woke up naked next to my gay roommate after a night of drinking. Neither he nor I remember anything. FML
Today, I went down on my boyfriend, and tried out a new trick I learned. I read in a magazine that if you hum while giving oral, it's supposed to feel good. My boyfriend started laughing and told me to stop after 30 seconds because I reminded him of his singing toothbrush. FML
Today, I tried to get my golden retriever to stand in front of our church for a very short time to illustrate the point of a sermon. When I brought my dog up, he mounted the pastor's leg and began humping him. FML
Today, my husband and I switched phones by accident. I've already received several naked pictures from one of his co-workers. FML
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