Today, my boss fired me via text message. I don't have a text messaging plan. I paid $0.25 to get fired. FML
AllysonCast
Today, I texted my college boyfriend to tell him how terrible I felt about cheating. He replied saying he was so relieved because he had been cheating on me with a girl in his dorm. I was talking about my math exam. FML
Can't take the heat?
Today, I dropped my hair straightener. The good news is I caught it. The bad news is I caught it by the iron itself. FML
Rainy day
Today, I slipped and fell in mud while running from the car to inside to avoid getting wet in a torrential downpour. I was running from the limo, in my wedding dress, to the church for my wedding. FML
Today, with 24 inches of snow on the ground, it is raining like hell. The weight of the snow, now full of rain water, collapsed the roof over my living room. I was eating cereal in my underwear, in the living room, directly under the failure. I'm cold. FML