robotiick7

Today, I found out that my boyfriend paid a guy to tell me he was dead. FML

Today, I feel massively depressed, but I can't talk to anyone about it as I'm British. FML

Today, my fiancée has been saying, "Shit's gone cray-cray" for over a week. I finally snapped. When I was done ranting, she murmured, "Baby, don't be cray-cray". FML

Today, I was watching adult videos in my apartment. I'm deaf, so I didn't realize my volume was at full blast until I put my hand over the speaker. FML

Today, I went out to lunch with my girlfriend. I asked if she was going to finish her meal, hoping to steal a bite or two. She somehow took this as me calling her fat, threw her drink at me, and stormed off. I just wanted some steak. FML

So, how've you been?

Today, I ran into a good friend at work. I work at a jail. She doesn't. FML