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offbeans - 17/02/2009 02:29 - United States

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

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identitychangeplease - 19/09/2012 20:41 - Sweden - Nyn?shamn

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

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Shame - 19/09/2012 20:22 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my girlfriend had a bitch fit at me because I laughed at her idea of getting the Cullen family tree tattooed on her back. FML

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Anonymous - 18/09/2012 14:48 - United Kingdom - London

Today, thinking I was alone in my house, I went downstairs in my underwear, singing at the top of my voice. I strutted into the kitchen to find two middle-aged men I'd never seen before sat at the kitchen table, drinking coffee. Turns out they will be painting our house for the next two weeks. FML

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j5maria

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mercredi 19 septembre 2012 1:17

Hi everyone, it was me that posted this FML! Loving all your comments, and yes, it was a pretty embarrassing moment.

Icepick in the ears time

Anonymous - 08/09/2012 11:38 - United States - Salem

Today, I realized how much it sucks to have the same name as my dad when I overheard my mom moan his name in bed. FML

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