Somewhere your not, Nowhere
Today, I finally got up the nerve to ask this really cute girl out I've had a crush on for over eight months. Turns out she isn't a girl. FML
Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML
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