RadVelociraptor

Today, several family members, including my mum, deleted me from Facebook in a concerted show of contempt. Apparently, I just can't shut up about World of Warcraft. FML

Today, on the way to work, I was punched in the balls by a complete stranger. FML

Today, I discovered my parents have spent my college fund because "2012 will happen" before I graduate. FML

Today, I was sitting in social studies and someone threw a note at me. It said "Go fuck yourself, everyone hates you, just die." FML

Today, I ate at Chipotle. There was a girl sitting alone, so I asked if I could eat lunch with her. She said yes, and as I sat down I tried to open my bag of chips. When trying to do so, my hand slipped, and I punched myself in the face. She laughed, and promptly left. FML

Today, my friend came over with brownies as a treat before work. She works in a bakery so I thought it was lovely. After starting work, I became stoned. She thought it was a great prank. I was fired. FML

Today, I took a picture of myself and put it on Facebook. After I did so, I realized that in the background, you can see my crush's Facebook page up on my laptop. He tagged himself. FML

Today, I treated my mom to a movie and lunch after she'd attended weeks of AA meetings. She snuck in a flask to the movie, and during lunch, she started calling people muggles. FML