Emily00007

Today, I went to my first class of the year. The first thing the teacher said was, "I hate this f*cking school." FML

Spooky

Today, I used a restroom. While doing my thing, the power in my building completely went out. There was another person in the restroom making demonic noises and scratching at my stall. When the power came back on, he was gone. I think I'm being haunted. FML

Today, I was asked to leave a church service for laughing at the kids trying to sing. FML

Today, after years of counseling and therapy for my anger issues, I snapped. Two words: Flappy Bird. FML

Today, I was scrubbing the bloody aftermath of a successful mouse trap off of my stove with an old toothbrush. After a few good scrubs, out of habit I put the toothbrush in my mouth while I turned on the water. FML