Sexy time Anonymous - Today, I woke up to my balls being sucked on. Unfortunately, it was by a mosquito. I hate the summer. FML 17 221 1 784
Anonymous - 29/07/2016 19:30 - United States Today, I threw a party. My drunk boyfriend decided to bring my 50-inch flatscreen TV downstairs from our bedroom. The TV didn't make it. FML 14 670 1 606
Jaraxxus - 26/07/2016 09:45 - United States - Vass Today, my girlfriend accused me of cheating because I've been buying generic groceries instead of name brand to save money. Apparently, I must be using the extra money on another woman. FML 16 037 1 184
Junkrat - 08/12/2016 13:32 Today, I was giving my boyfriend oral sex when he pulled away without warning. As I looked up at him to see what was wrong, he screamed "JUSTICE RAINS FROM ABOVE!" and shot his load in my eyes. FML 16 588 3 321
OP here! No, we talked about it before this, so she knew why. I'm not sure why she thinks this.