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pita2423

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Tuesday 03 March 1992

Pita2423

I am 23, and work in a retail store

Pita2423 -

AndreaHoff...

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lovers5201

Gaston_Mes...

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Windmill

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Pita2423

Pita2423

T-Bear - 07/10/2015 15:02 - United States - College Station

Today, I'm staying at my grandparents' house. I went upstairs to grab my sketchbook to show off to my grandma. My grandpa is half-deaf, which I guess explains how he didn't hear me. I heard him though, jerking off and muttering the most disgusting sexual things about "Tara." I'm Tara. FML

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Teambuilding

Anonymous - 06/10/2015 19:58 - United States - Macomb

Today, I had to quickly back out of a Skype call between me and three coworkers because my fiancée came home from work in tears. When things had calmed down, I re-entered the call to find them unaware I had returned, saying how glad they were I had left because they all secretly despise me. FML

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stardustveins - 24/09/2015 01:14 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was waiting in the McDonald's drive-thru and listening to some music. I was tapping my non-driving foot to the song when I accidentally tapped the wrong foot and rear ended the cop car in front of me. Whoops. FML

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CircusSea - 05/11/2012 00:02 - Puerto Rico - Carolina

Today, I work on a cruise ship, and I just learned that we have a morgue on board. How did I learn that? It's right next to the crew laundry room, and I opened the wrong door. It was occupied. FML

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DUDE! WTF?

imanidiot - 03/03/2009 06:29 - United States

Today, I'd been sat in traffic for about an hour. I've heard stories about people doing the dirty in their cars, and I never do anything risky so I thought, why not, I'll be here a while, no one can see me: I'll masturbate. Midway through, I heard a tap on my driver's window. It was a police officer. FML

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