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lovers5201

Dominict

valerie - 28/05/2011 01:04 - United States

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a handjob for the first time. It took ages for him to get excited, and in the end the only thing that blew up was him, saying, "Oh my god, just stop it already." FML

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Anonymous - 25/05/2011 20:33 - Canada

Today, I received a friend request on Facebook from my biological father, who I have never met in my life. As I was scrolling through his hobbies and interests, I saw "Drinking," "Black women with big asses," and "Getting laid, lol." FML

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StatusSearch - 26/05/2011 23:36 - United States

Today, I went to a restaurant and sat at the last available table, which had a seat available across from me. A cute girl approached and asked if she could sit down, so I said "Sure" and made some room. She then asked "You're leaving, right?" FML

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vendredi 27 mai 2011 11:01

I told her I'd be done in 10 minutes which I was prepared to leave at that time, to which she replied, "Could you make it 5, I'm really hungry." So 10 minutes turned into 50. I must've lost track of time >_>

Lifeless

Motionless - 26/05/2011 09:55 - United States

Today, I had sex with my girlfriend. This is the seventh time in a row that she hasn't moved or made any noises the entire way through. FML

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