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Anonymous - 08/11/2010 01:13 - United States

Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML

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Learning

dummy - 11/07/2011 19:21 - United States

Today, while babysitting a five year-old, I found a cartoon called Metalocalypse for him to watch while I made dinner. I didn't realize it was an "adult" cartoon until afterwards. He watched a whole episode about a clown with a cocaine problem. FML

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MakeMyDay_27 - 27/06/2011 16:46 - United States

Today, my daughter told me that my head is shaped like a kidney bean and that I'm lucky she even talks to me in public. She's 6. FML

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A little less conversation…

IPityTheStool - 09/06/2011 13:22 - United Kingdom

Today, I used the staff toilets at school. As I sat down, I heard a sudden plop, followed by the stench of diarrhoea from the next cubicle. It was followed by, "I do apologise!" It was my English teacher. Then we continued to chat. FML

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Go to jail, donut pass go

Golden~ - - Canada

Today, I found out that the school principal takes all the money from the school fundraisers to buy herself donuts. I'd donated over $100. FML

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