•
•
•

monocyte

0

0

4

50

1986

18

Monocyte

Hi

Monocyte -

Monocyte -

Monocyte

lovers5201

thebear683

ЗАБЕРИТЕ 1...

Alexis_lik...

waytoolone...

ragnarok15...

Rababco

wondercat4...

Mukuro_fml

Supersid33...

Hash13

Toughsky

Mukuro_fml

Monocyte

Monocyte

Deep sleep

Anonymous - 04/08/2013 19:28 - United States - Scottsdale

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

74 896

9 864

Anonymous - 23/11/2014 17:46 - United States

Today, I held the door open for an old lady, before realizing she was a teacher taking 20-plus kids to lunch at local burger joint, all of whom got in front of me in the line to order. FML

36 373

5 250

too good - 24/10/2014 10:54 - United Kingdom - Dartford

Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML

45 076

14 593

Anonymous - 19/10/2014 01:23 - United States - South Salem

Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend, but I was so nervous that I had a panic attack, fainted and split my head open. My girlfriend then fainted at the sight of the blood. An onlooker had to call an ambulance for both of us. FML

41 306

4 148

facepalm - 15/10/2014 23:36 - United States - Gainesville

Today, coming home, I opened up my door to find my drunk boyfriend trying to teach our three baby parakeets to perch on his erect penis. FML

40 446

4 390