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Noname - 17/01/2009 13:31 - United States

Today, my boyfriend texted me, asking if I had left my underwear over at his place. No, no I didn't. They weren't mine. Awesome. FML

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Noname - 16/03/2009 04:05 - United States

Today, I was rejected from the University of Washington. My dad has been a professor there for 30 years, and is on the board of admissions. FML

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Noname - 13/03/2009 07:27 - United States

Today, I finally got the courage to tell my best friend that I've had a crush on him since our junior year. Since I couldn't see him I shot him a text. His response: "Yeah I know. I've tried kind of ignoring it." FML

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Noname - 06/03/2009 19:04 - United States

Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML

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ak. - 02/03/2009 21:26 - United States

Today, I was laying with my girlfriend on the couch. I looked at her and said, "You're so beautiful. How did I ever get you?" She replied, "I was drunk." FML

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