•
•
•

hellocarl

0

0

6

0

466

86

28
Saturday 28 June 1997

Hellocarl

Hellocarl -

Hellocarl -

Hellocarl

lovers5201

HighTekRed...

jasmine_ba...

scouzee

Hellocarl

Hellocarl

Bigmouth Strikes Again

lpilou - 21/11/2008 05:40 - France

Today, I was finally able to get to know a girl at university who I'd been eyeing up for months. We had a nice conversation. We discovered that we live in the same area, and so we talked about that. I told her that the little restaurant under my house was really disgusting. Her parents own it. FML

32 813

10 917

jakeson12 - 24/11/2012 00:38 - United Kingdom - Dundee

Today, my "friend" thought it'd be absolutely hilarious to use my phone to text my girlfriend, bragging that I'd found a new "slampiece" and that she's "fukcin dumpd". Now I'm single, her dad keeps making threatening calls to me, and nobody will even listen to my side of the story. FML

31 975

3 546

Gotcha

Embarassed - 23/11/2012 06:14 - United States - Kent

Today, my girlfriend dared me to put on her bra and panties and give her a lap dance. Feeling spontaneous, I decided to do it. Just as I was getting really into it, she told me I was on webcam for all her friends. Apparently it was a contest of who had their boyfriend the most whipped. She won. FML

54 938

16 005

Badass

zzz - - Canada - Campbell River

Today, I was nicknamed "Sandman." Not after the badass Spider-Man villain but rather because my personality is so boring it puts people to sleep. FML

21 978

4 401

rubberduck1 - 16/11/2012 05:04 - United States - Mattoon

Today, I told my boss I could handle running the floor buffer. Thirty seconds in, I lost control and became pinned to the wall by its force. In my state of shock and embarrassment, I didn't realize the only thing keeping me trapped was my grip on the accelerator. FML

8 303

24 056