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sunny_ca559 - 03/03/2010 01:03 - United States

Today, my husband admitted to me that he has a mental block about touching my boobs, because he's afraid that breast milk is going to spurt out at him. I had my son 5 months ago and I don't breast feed. FML

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anonymous - 20/02/2010 01:47 - Ireland

Today, while in bed with my game-obsessed girlfriend, she told me I was a "noob" in bed. FML

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Nick - 11/02/2010 18:35 - United States

Today, I was carrying a hot cup of noodles. I sneezed and accidentally stabbed myself in the forehead with a fork. FML

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Nick - 26/01/2010 21:26 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out I have a daughter. How did I find out? She added me on Facebook. FML

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Numbnuts - 08/03/2010 03:08 - United States

Today, I was really bored and decided to annoy my mom while she was doing the dishes. I walked up behind her, touched her shoulder, and said "Poke". She then donkey kicks me straight in the nuts saying "Kick". I know now to never bug my mom when she's in a bad mood. FML

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