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PrettyKookieToo

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1912

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London, England

Prettykookietoo

No matter what I write here, I will end up hating my past self for writing it, like Karkat or something. So, I elect to write nothing in particular.

Prettykookietoo -

Prettykookietoo -

Prettykookietoo

lovers5201

MarilynLem...

Sazael

surfingkjj

1915destro...

lui_pg

HarshD9619

wondercat4...

SlimDanny

oops6663

flashback....

whitelight...

MarilynLem...

Prettykookietoo

Prettykookietoo

Not smart

Mateo - 14/12/2008 03:58 - France

Today, I surprised my girlfriend by turning up at her flat on her 24th birthday. She got up from the couch as I entered, and I shouted, "Tonight, my cock is going to stab you twenty-four times!" (Okay, that's not smart). That's when her father glanced over from the couch and greeted me. FML

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NSFW FML

Fireguy92 - - United States - Dewitt

Today, as a firefighter, we were called to assist the ambulance crew with lifting a deceased patient out of a house. Little did I know, he had been dead inside for 3 weeks, and was bloated and popped like a water balloon when we attempted to move him. My girlfriend made soup for the evening meal. FML

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un_christmas - 25/12/2012 06:41 - Malaysia - Petaling Jaya

Today, my boyfriend and I were having Christmas dinner while his mom was away. I was lying alone on his bed while he did the dishes, when the bedroom door dramatically swung open and his mom glared at me from the doorway. I had to leave when she screamed "FORNICATION IS A SIN!" FML

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Anonymous - 07/12/2012 04:49 - United States - Moorhead

Today, my daughter finally gave birth to twin boys. She informed me that she named them Peregrin Took and Meriadoc Brandybuck. My grandsons are named after Hobbits. FML

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Gagging for it

comeuntome - 29/11/2012 19:42 - United States

Today, it's the first day of my two-week stay at my in-laws' house. They forbid drinking, smoking, cursing, and anything even remotely sexual. I smuggled in my quietest toy to keep me sane in this holy house. If only I hadn't forgotten to bring the battery pack too. FML

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