•
•
•

brandnewkey

0

0

14

38

1868

86

Online, The Web
37
Friday 02 December 1988

Brandnewkey

What a great waste of time.

Brandnewkey -

Brandnewkey -

Brandnewkey

lovers5201

MarilynLem...

wrestler45...

ziya19

ЗАБЕРИТЕ 1...

ЗАБЕРИТЕ 1...

iYodah

Poyzin7323

hafyyyy

cxsuzanne

clairesuck...

03stroker0...

Brandnewkey

Brandnewkey

Kaji - 14/11/2008 11:20 - France

Today, I sent a text message to my girlfriend telling her how much I wanted to make love to her tonight. I've just realized I sent it to her brother. FML

44 559

24 137

goinginsane - 06/05/2011 07:25

Today, I was told that I am an incredibly boring person and that it's no wonder I have no friends. I think they're right; last night I dreamt about a nail file. FML

33 798

7 173

Training

Anonymous - 10/04/2011 05:07 - United States

Today, I promised my boyfriend a blow job every time he does the dishes. Every dish in the house has been washed three times already. FML

22 472

72 673

rhartnett11 - 16/02/2011 12:56

Today, I woke up to a bloody nose. Instead of rushing to the bathroom, I creatively dripped the blood over a knife for photography class because the assignment was to show emotion. So many of the students and faculty were disturbed that I'm now forced to talk to the school psychologist. FML

27 700

41 219

Anonymous - 15/02/2011 19:28 - United States

Today, while sitting on the couch, my boyfriend came over, pulled his penis out of his fly, and started stabbing me in the face with it while humming the Jaws theme. FML

51 238

14 280