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lovers5201

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Emmy16474

bittersweet - 08/02/2009 03:08 - United States

Today, I texted my boyfriend saying "Hi." His response: "I got your best friend pregnant". FML

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ohcrap - 02/08/2011 04:58 - United States

Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML

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lynn777 - 04/04/2011 20:42 - Canada

Today, I was walking home through the slush and snow when a car drove by, soaking me with dirty water. Frustrated, I flipped him off. He then turned around and splashed me again. FML

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Not funny, son

Embarassed - 15/03/2011 19:29 - United States

Today, while at a school anti-drugs assembly, the speaker asked everyone to stand up if they knew someone who had died of an overdose. As I stood up, my friend hit me in the side, making me laugh. I stood frozen under accusing glares while the speaker bitched me out for a good 5 minutes. FML

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You walked into that situation, mate

sylverster - - Singapore

Today, I banged into a glass door. My friend laughed at me, so I turned around and gave him the finger, then turned back to continue walking and banged into the door again. FML

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