almcf

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Almcf's favorite FMLs

By bowler99 - 12/01/2015 16:43 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, my little brother walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex and threatened to tell my parents. I paid him $30 to keep quiet. 15 minutes later he told them. FML

agreeclassic 39 295

vote type 1 15 161

Thanks, I guess…

By reallyson? - 12/01/2015 05:28 - United States - South Hadley

Today, I got undressed in front of my boyfriend for the first time. His reaction? "You're chubbier than I expected." FML

agreeclassic 46 563

vote type 1 4 762

By Anonymous - 12/01/2015 02:41 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. His father was completely wasted, his mom was high, and his 11-year-old sister was talking about her favorite alcoholic drinks at the dinner table. FML

agreeclassic 37 100

vote type 1 3 322

New isn't always good

By anonymous - 11/01/2015 19:10 - United States - Iowa City

Today, my girlfriend and I were trying something new. I ended up with a shard of glass in my back and a concussion. Don't have sex on a glass table. FML

agreeclassic 22 257

vote type 1 32 490

By Anonymous - 11/01/2015 08:44

Today, my brother woke me up by trying to light my bed on fire. FML

agreeclassic 33 970

vote type 1 2 844