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Neevster

Anonymous - 03/12/2017 00:30 - United Kingdom - Poole

Today, a gothic 16-year-old with a bread knife tried to mug me. After warning her to back off multiple times, I punched her in the face. She ran off crying and reported me to the police. They don't believe my side of the story. FML

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Anonymous - 17/04/2015 20:43 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was playing Monopoly with my extended family. When my wife came home, she kicked me out of the game, and took all my money and property. When I said she couldn't do that, she said, "Sure I can. It's called divorce." Everyone laughed. Now I'm bored as hell, watching everyone else play. FML

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Moosie - 01/06/2017 13:53

Today, I have a crush on my 22-year-old coworker. A really bad one. I'm 59. How did this happen? FML

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Moosie11

Moosie11 17

mardi 30 mai 2017 19:03

How great it was to read ( most ) of the responses. Because of the situation I can't tell anyone but really needed some feedback. Glad I remembered this site, I was going nuts.

Responsible adult

baddaughter - 16/11/2009 17:11 - Canada

Today, I called my mother who is vacationing in Florida with my dad and sister. Before they left I told them I would be very responsible and that they could trust me. The first thing she asked me is if all the animals were still alive. I said yes. I lied. Her favourite cat drowned in the pool. FML

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You've been served

Anonymous - 27/04/2017 04:00

Today, my recent ex-boyfriend stopped by my house with a well-dressed man. He reached into his pocket and handed me records that "prove" he never cheated on me. Oh, and the man next to him? His lawyer, who gave me a summons to court over payment for the items I smashed when I dumped him. FML

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