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maddiecat

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Credibility loss

Anonymous - 09/09/2020 11:01 - United States - Rockaway Park

Today, I was promoted to vice president of my company. I gave a speech explaining how I intended to run things more transparently. When I bent down to pick up my folder, my pants split. Somebody said, "Powerpuff girls panties. Transparent indeed." FML

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purged - 08/06/2013 23:43 - United States - Mechanicsville

Today, my boyfriend and I watched the new movie "The Purge." After the movie, I jokingly asked him that if the U.S. had such a purge in real life, would he participate, and who would he kill first. Without missing a beat, he said, "you." FML

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Bit on the side

Anonymous - 22/08/2020 23:10

Today, I have been talking to someone for the past 9 months. He always said he could never give me a relationship. But he loves me. He finally told me it’s because he’s been with someone for 3 years and I’m basically the side chick he fell in love with. FML

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Anonymous - 13/10/2013 16:20 - United States - Bessemer

Today, after holing myself up in my room for the day, I eventually turned my phone back on and told my girlfriend that my grandma passed away today. She replied, "Ask me if I fucking care," then accused me of not caring about our relationship because I went offline all day. FML

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