•
•
•

darkxsky86

0

0

7

12

1140

10

LA

Darkxsky86

Sup?

Darkxsky86 -

Darkxsky86 -

Darkxsky86

lovers5201

AnAwkwardC...

iHiccupBS

pocketemo1...

Exotic_Nih...

Covenant74

sergysalaz...

NessieMons...

neeni88

happylappy

emmingle

crazycooki...

Darkxsky86

Darkxsky86

Marco - 01/04/2013 21:00 - United States

Today, I brought a girl home from a bar. Things were getting hot and heavy when she asked if I had a condom. I opened my wallet to grab the one I keep in there, only to find the empty wrapper in its place; it was the only one I had. It seems drunk me is a bigger jerk than I thought. FML

21 023

45 671

Anonymous - 09/07/2013 16:07 - United States - Katy

Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML

56 765

23 103

nosestealer - 07/07/2013 21:57 - Canada - Brampton

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

58 491

9 876

What the…?

Anonymous - - United States - San Marcos

Today, I had a dream about marrying Hitler. I've had this same dream three times now. My subconscious is starting to scare me. FML

51 515

5 329

melons - 03/07/2013 09:09 - United Kingdom - Redditch

Today, the massive bogey that had been dangling precariously from my manager's nose for half an hour finally detached itself. Into my coffee. FML

49 130

5 308