•
•
•

assassinthefirst

0

0

5

25

880

40

New York, USA
32
Saturday 07 August 1993

Assassinthefirst

Assassinthefirst -

Assassinthefirst -

Assassinthefirst

lovers5201

kickin__it

MarilynLem...

Lex283

BellaBelle...

ndawgg

MarilynLem...

Assassinthefirst

Assassinthefirst

Tara - 31/10/2008 07:06 - Sweden

Today, I babysat a four year-old kid, so his parents could go out to party. Once in bed, he yelled, "I want to go party!" After three or four times, I told him to go to sleep. Two hours later, he'd wet the bed, saying, "I told you I want to go potty!" FML

19 001

52 330

douglas - 17/07/2011 07:14 - United States

Today, I surprised my four year-old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it "Horny". FML

40 198

8 260

Backfired

gir - 14/07/2011 19:35 - United States

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

34 626

97 549

wittlegirl - 13/07/2011 18:16 - United States

Today, my parents think that I don't understand all the sexual euphemisms in their conversations. One of the more recent ones being made by my dad at the dinner table, "This sausage is great, honey, but mine is bigger and tastier!" FML

48 394

4 010

Family Matters

whyme102008 - 13/07/2011 06:32 - United States

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

152 179

8 681