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kingwithnocrown

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Kingwithnocrown

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Kingwithnocrown

lovers5201

Kingwithnocrown

Kingwithnocrown

Rough

aarone23 - - United States

Today, I was slammed onto my car, thrown on the ground, and arrested for outstanding warrants from 1979. I was born in 1992. FML

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Just a prank, bro

iscreamforicecream - 01/06/2011 11:53 - United States

Today, while I was sleeping, my girlfriend took my phone and set the ringtone to a bloodcurdling scream. I found this out when I received a call while driving to work and, thinking someone was being murdered in my backseat, I panicked and swerved into a parked car. FML

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Go to jail, donut pass go

Golden~ - - Canada

Today, I found out that the school principal takes all the money from the school fundraisers to buy herself donuts. I'd donated over $100. FML

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veggiepower11028 - 31/05/2011 12:02

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded with, "That's nice. You know what I love? Chicken wings. Let's go get some." Apparently, he doesn't remember I'm a vegetarian either. FML

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Me - 31/05/2011 06:49 - United States

Today, while at work, a rather large woman came in and ordered a cheeseburger. When asking if she would like to supersize it, she took her purse, smacked me, and told me she wasn't fat, and how rude I was for calling her supersized. I was just doing my job. FML

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