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bittersweet - 08/02/2009 03:08 - United States

Today, I texted my boyfriend saying "Hi." His response: "I got your best friend pregnant". FML

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WellShit - 04/01/2013 02:19 - United States - New Richland

Today, I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML

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Les Miserables is so sad - 02/01/2013 23:38 - Canada - Saint Albert

Today, I took my girlfriend to go see Les Misérables. I tried to stay tough but completely lost it and started sobbing when Anne Hathaway began singing. My girlfriend called me a wimp and stayed dry-eyed throughout the whole movie. I'm dating a robot. FML

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apparentlythereisnokarma - 01/01/2013 21:00 - Canada - Didsbury

Today, my roommate stumbled in drunk at 5am with 3 Big Macs, and passed out on the floor after eating them. This happens almost every night. I stay in, study, work, and go to the gym almost everyday. And she still has better grades, a better body, and makes more money than me. FML

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MY EARS! MY EARS!

ashbeat - 01/01/2013 15:20 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I can hear my flatmate masturbating loudly and asking himself if he likes it. And replying. FML

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