MidnightMadness

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Midnightmadness

Midnightmadness -

Midnightmadness

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Midnightmadness

anon - 13/01/2014 01:53 - United States - Bullhead City

Today, my husband and I decided to have a quickie before the kids woke up from their nap. The sex was amazing and I couldn't hold in my screams or not hit the wall. About 15 minutes in, both of our children came busting in with their nerf guns, screaming, "Where's the monster?" FML

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Great, I guess

Anonymous - 14/12/2013 07:24 - Canada - Milton

Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He seemed thrilled, and went to buy some wine to celebrate. He left 11 hours ago and won't come back. FML

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mattrd - 08/10/2013 21:04 - United States - Lititz

Today, I got my two-year-old's Halloween costume in the mail. I tried it on him to make sure it fit. He loves it so much that he is now having a complete meltdown because he wants to go trick-or-treating. He doesn't understand we only go trick-or-treating on Halloween. 23 more days to go. FML

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mattrd_fml

mattrd_fml 31

mercredi 9 octobre 2013 16:16

OP here! First off, for all the people inquiring about what the costume is, it is a plush dinosaur that his legs go into and his upper half sticks out of it. You can see a picture of it if you search "dinosaur" at costume express. And the issue isnt that he loves the costume, in fact he hated putting it on at first. The issue is that he wants candy and he wants candy RIGHT NOW. Thanks for all the suggestions. But now that a day has gone by, the costume is in a closet and he seems to have forgotten all about it.

thekriss - 23/08/2012 20:28 - France - Paris

Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML

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19apollo91 - 09/05/2011 17:33 - United Kingdom

Today, an unpaid intern had his first day at my workplace of seven years. As a joke, my boss gave him the same challenge she gave me on my first day. The intern completed it in 37 minutes. We've always been told it's impossible. Guess we all have to start working harder. FML

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19apollo91

19apollo91 1

mercredi 11 mai 2011 12:29

The challenge was to create a protocol for measuring the thickness of double and triple glazed windows (none of which open) around the company's building. Nothing to do with our actual jobs, most of us just figured it was a trick to get the new guys caught staring out of windows. He won't tell me his method...