Derpy_Fish

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2962144, USA
35 years-old
Tuesday 27 November 1990
couple

A propos de Derpy_fish

Notorious, long-time lurker, might even say professional. I've lurked on many a page for a very long time. Always prefer to sit idly by in the shadows.

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Fucked!

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Derpy_fish's favorite FMLs

Reported

By maximumpower - 15/03/2009 01:46 - United States

Today, I was eating at a restaurant in town, when a small boy started looking at me. I simply smiled and went back to eating, only to hear out of the corner of my ear, "Daddy, why does that kid's face look like that"? He said it so loud, the three tables next to us turned and looked. FML

agreeclassic 53 167

vote type 1 3 528

By Anonymous - 12/02/2014 21:25 - Australia

Today, I found out the real reason my boyfriend kept starting fights with me, and why my best friend kept telling me to break up with him. It was so they could turn their affair into a proper relationship, then twist it around to make me look like a bitch for dumping him. FML

agreeclassic 65 652

vote type 1 4 847

Are you experienced?

By ugh - 11/03/2013 11:33 - United States - Easthampton

Today, I was caught "experimenting" with my friend at his house. His parents called mine, and my dad came to drive me home. On the way back, he tried to cheer me up by saying, "Son, don't be ashamed. When I was your age, I sucked a few dicks myself." Thanks for the info, Dad. FML

agreeclassic 56 617

vote type 1 27 061

The strangeness of strangers

By zomg - this FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Port Saint Lucie

Today, while at work as a cashier, I tried to be sweet and ID an elderly man buying a bottle of wine. He responded by calling me a "blind-ass bitch" and calling my manager for "harassing" him. FML

agreeclassic 15 907

vote type 1 29 753

By axel519 - 31/12/2011 02:43 - United States

Today, my girlfriend decided to raid my games collection and try her hand at Amnesia: The Dark Descent. Two hours later, despite my best attempts to make her stop shrieking like a dying crackhead every two minutes, two cops showed up at the door with our neighbors in tow. FML

agreeclassic 28 063

vote type 1 3 064