JaykeXD

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Huntington Beach CA
31 years-old
Thursday 14 July 1994
couple

A propos de Jaykexd

Whoa...I'm Jayke. I'm always happy and I love meeting new people so hit me up. Not trying to be a dick but when I read some of these stories it makes me appreciate my predictable boring life. Oh, I'm kind of a spelling nazi. Seriously though, send me a damned message. I'm fucking lonely over here.

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Jaykexd's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 25/02/2010 00:29 - United States

Today, my roommate brought a kitten to the apartment. I hate cats, and probably sensing this, the thing clawed me right in the crotch. I of course am not going to say a thing because I happen to be in love with my roommate, but she has no clue how much I hate this thing. FML

agreeclassic 14 989

vote type 1 28 105

By hnickell93 - 09/10/2012 01:55 - United States - Visalia

Today, I was consoling my drunk husband as he violently emptied his stomach contents into our toilet. One particular retch made me nauseous, and I vomited all down his back, causing him to turn his head and vomit all over the wall. I got to clean it all up. FML

agreeclassic 27 762

vote type 1 5 414

By Anonymous - 24/09/2012 02:26 - United States

Today, I found out that my parents changed the code on our alarm system while they were out of town. The police could not verify I was their son, despite spending hours trying to get hold of them. They thought it was just another telemarketer. FML

agreeclassic 24 603

vote type 1 1 573

By lonelygirl - 17/08/2012 23:33 - United States - Circleville

Today, I bought the only cat on Earth that doesn't like chasing after a laser dot. Goodbye, hours of sick, sick entertainment. FML

agreeclassic 15 073

vote type 1 27 033

Happy Caturday

By couchsurfer - 10/08/2012 00:02 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I finally convinced my girlfriend to allow the cats to sleep with us on the bed. As we started to cuddle, one of the cats pissed right in between us. We are sleeping on the couch until the baking soda absorbs the smell in the mattress. I'll be sleeping there longer than that. FML

agreeclassic 11 081

vote type 1 29 974