Dynamite73

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3499

A-fuckin-murica!, Merica
27
Thursday 08 October 1998

Dynamite73

I like to do stuff like throw knives, blow stuff up, make fire, shoot guns, and play paintball.

Dynamite73 -

RoseBoffin

Dynamite73 -

Dynamite73

lovers5201

isaviig

RoseBoffin

BettyTimmo...

Ashamed_Si...

polishchic...

GoT_IssUes

Cali

GRGR

Soninuva

yuno_gasai...

doyouwantm...

BettyTimmo...

Cali

Shmatterho...

ChickenNug

MyrmidonQu...

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mikotomisa...

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Dynamite73

Awwwww

Anonymous - 18/02/2016 00:53 - United States - Taunton

Today, I worked such a long shift at Panera that when my boyfriend called later, I answered, "It's a fresh day at Panera Bread in [town], this is [name] speaking. How may I help you?" He thought it was hilarious. FML

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sciencenat - 14/01/2016 06:36 - France - V?lizy-villacoublay

Today, as a natural science teacher, I was drawing a uterus on the class chalkboard. One of my students started messing around and being noisy, so I shouted, "Be quiet and check out my uterus!" FML

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Anonymous - 06/12/2013 18:15 - Norway - Ytre Arna

Today, I got on the bus. Before I could make it to a free seat, the driver hit the gas, and the sudden movement caused me to stumble and accidentally grab onto another passenger for support. She didn't appreciate this, accused me of molesting her, and got me thrown back off. FML

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Doppelganger

eleonor - 02/12/2008 04:57 - France

Today, I sent a text message to my boyfriend, saying, "Come over in an hour, I love you." An hour later, the doorbell rang. It was my ex, looking happy and still as smitten with me as before, with a bunch of roses. I'd got the wrong number. My ex and my boyfriend have the same name. FML

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EnderHorse - 05/11/2015 20:52 - United States - Cincinnati

Today, I went to the dentist to get a tooth worked on. I got tongue-tied and instead of asking if they could anesthetize me, I accidentally asked if they could euthanize me. FML

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