Anonymous - 30/08/2011 17:35 - Canada Today, I tried to impress the guy I like. He breeds reptiles, and I happen to have a snake and a lizard. I went over to his house to show them off. He opened the door just as my lizard fell between my boobs. He had to help me get it out. FML 26 409 12 882
Fancy seeing you here! tryingnottocare - 06/08/2009 20:01 - United Kingdom Today, after being supportive for nearly a year, my brother finally came out of the closet and introduced the family to his new boyfriend. His new boyfriend happens to be my ex-boyfriend. Guess I know why that didn't work out now. FML 55 752 4 616
Barrel - 05/02/2009 07:57 - United States Today, my wife left me the following voicemail: “Alex, last night was amazing. You took me to places I’ve never been to before. I can’t wait to see you tonight after work.” My name is Rob. We haven’t had sex in two years. FML 62 831 9 053