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muder679

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rmb131 - 20/03/2009 04:33 - Canada

Today, I went to the dentist. He asked me to lean my head closer to him so he could get a better look at my teeth. He was hard. FML

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Anonymous - 29/12/2010 05:20 - United States

Today, I realized that I'll have to explain to my child that mommy and daddy met on World of Warcraft. FML

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Anonymous - 25/12/2010 06:20 - United States

Today, while socializing after a church service, I discovered I'm still referred to as "Fireshit's brother", after an incident a year ago which involved my sister screaming "the devil is coming out of my anus!" from the lavatory. FML

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Big question

snoozerlooser - 25/12/2010 00:00 - Canada

Today, I overheard my boyfriend of two years tell his friend he was going to "pop the question." Ecstatic, I wore my nicest dress and got my hair done for dinner. Near the end, he leant in romantically and asked if we could start doing anal. So much for marriage. FML

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Hello there!

Username - - United States

Today, after pulling an all-nighter, I had the pleasure of meeting my girlfriend's mother for the very first time. She walked in on me in the bathroom; I'd completely lost focus and fallen asleep while taking a shit. FML

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