linzzzbambi

476

Fairfax, United States

Linzzzbambi

This app gets me through the day.

Linzzzbambi -

Linzzzbambi

lovers5201

Marie1994

Dudebroman...

Isolated

Ayezed

woiz

MortenM

Izzyduck07

zbt13_fml

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Linzzzbambi

It never rains, it pours

jaeilssanguh - 26/11/2009 18:49 - United States

Today, I was walking in rain. I had my hands in my pants pockets, so that the front of the jacket was pointing down. Halfway to Taco Bell, my crotch felt exceptionally wet. I looked down to see a wet spot. The rain on my jacket was channeled to my crotch. FML

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eer004 - 07/12/2013 10:06 - United States - Odessa

Today, my husband learned that if he asks me a question while I am dead asleep my answer will most likely be "Yes". Incidentally, I now have a new cat. FML

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eer004

eer004 8

lundi 16 décembre 2013 4:43

I am really surprised this made it through. on the bright side we had been discussing getting a cat for our daughter. I just expected to let her pick it out, not to wake up to a knew kitten in my bed

It is

Anonymous - 07/12/2013 07:17 - United States - San Pablo

Today, my fifteen year-old son decided to tell his little five year-old sister that Santa isn't real. She now refuses to talk to any of us and thinks "her whole life is a lie". FML

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Too late

Anonymous - 27/10/2013 23:46 - United States - Paramus

Today, I got married. My husband and I had been waiting until marriage to have sex, and when the time came, we started to undress. As I took my bra off, his eyes glazed over, and he fainted. An hour later, all he could say was, "I don't think we're meant to be together." FML

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Eric - 27/02/2012 21:58 - United States

Today, I ordered Chinese food. As I approached the restaurant to pick it up, I took out my keys and tried to unlock the front door. By the time I realized my mistake, everyone inside the restaurant had noticed and started laughing at me. FML

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