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Thursday 02 July 1992

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lonelyman - 20/11/2009 07:29 - United States

Today, I used text-to-speech just so that I can hear "I love you" for once. FML

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Halloween red flag

Teaching - - United States

Today, I was reading my students' Halloween stories I made them write for my creative writing class in high school. One of my students wrote about attacking me. She got my street address perfect and everything. FML

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4 596

Eimii - 06/10/2009 00:41 - United States

Today, my 70 year-old coworker gave me a letter telling me he was attracted to me, and wishes to have a relationship in which he can 'hold me in his arms every night'. I'm 21. FML

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Ouch!

P0wned - 29/09/2009 21:21 - France

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML

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The passenger

benander - 15/09/2009 21:14 - United States

Today, I was in the bathroom defecating when I felt something hanging there. I reached back with toilet paper and starting pulling it out inch by inch; 3 feet later I learned I had a tapeworm. Worst of all, no pharmacy has the med the doctor prescribed. I have to live with this thing until the med gets here. FML

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