•
•
•

Floortje

0

0

17

24

2995

5

Amsterdam

Floortje

Floortje -

Floortje -

Floortje

lovers5201

savvyshay

ЗАБЕРИТЕ 1...

yokonito

[296468658...

BirgitHerr...

tigond

reygliss

[237172454...

damo123

baylorgirl...

Alansmellz

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10

damo123

TacoloverS...

brandonwon...

jgwyh

fantasywor...

jacky75_fm...

24jfred

cooper3991

Holybatman

rogwest

Mornai

DaKrustyKr...

Floortje

Floortje

Humpty Dumpy

traumatized - 12/04/2014 18:07 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I was taking the biggest shit of my life. When I worked the thing out, it hit the water with such force that I got a toilet water enema from the backwash. I was so freaked out that I screamed and fell off the seat, prompting my husband to rush in to see what was wrong. FML

40 462

9 421

Anonymous - 12/01/2014 00:03 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, my girlfriend told me that she is pregnant. I asked how it could be possible, since she's on birth control. She said she didn't know her antibiotics would interfere with it. She's a pharmacist. FML

66 192

8 900

toni405 - 21/07/2011 21:24 - United States

Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML

46 787

11 485

Anon - 10/03/2011 15:08 - United States

Today, my boyfriend did the Austin Powers dance/strip-tease while dancing to 'I Touch Myself'. It was cute until he ripped off his shirt and revealed that he'd shaved his chest hair in the shape of a penis. FML

51 846

9 524

Just go

MitchFail - 23/07/2009 06:42 - United States

Today, in the midst of foreplay, this girl tells me I'm "so hot". I respond "Ditto." She heatedly responds, "I love ditto," to which I suavely reply, "I didn't know you were into Pokémon. That may make you even sexier." She knows nothing about Pokémon, but I sure know how to kill the mood. FML

20 748

74 147