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Florida, United States
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Wednesday 06 April 1988

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Heather - 31/05/2009 17:38 - United States

Today, I thought I would make my first trip to the beach. While in the water, I was stung by a jellyfish. My friend had to pee on me. I went back into the water to wash the pee off and got stung by another jellyfish. FML

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Happy place

Anonymous - 31/05/2009 17:36 - Poland

Today, my husband of ten years was playing the Sims. I asked him about the house he built. Apparently, it was his dream house, and he recreated himself as a Sim so he could live in it. Then I asked him where the wife was. There was no wife. It was his happy place. FML

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untitledentity - 24/05/2009 16:03 - United States

Today, I decided to use my mentor's advice. I told her I had been having some trouble controlling my anger, she told me to throw rocks at trees. I threw a rock at a tree, very hard. It bounced back hit me above the eye. I'm still pissed as shit. FML

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Bigmouth

XxespoxX - 11/05/2009 02:07 - United States

Today, my dad took me to a Yankees game at the new Yankee Stadium. During the 5th inning the camera crew put a man on the big screen. I yelled out, "Look at that ugly asshole!" It was the guy sitting 4 seats to the left of me. FML

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J - 11/02/2009 07:14 - United States

Today, at lunch I ordered a coke. The waiter replied "diet coke?" and I corrected him saying, "No, regular coke." He shook his head and said again, "diet coke." FML

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