Anonymous - 07/09/2014 15:55 - United States - Raleigh Today, I woke up to find a huge zit directly between my two eyebrows. My friends have started calling me "The North Star." FML 39 350 3 831
ugh - 03/09/2013 23:53 - United States - Lancaster Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML 25 769 40 931
Lightweight fmlTGOD - - United States Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I have a "drinking problem". She says I don't drink enough. FML 38 331 5 787