•
•
•

Myrddraalis

0

0

0

0

269

13

Myrddraalis

Myrddraalis -

Myrddraalis -

Myrddraalis

lovers5201

hellomynam...

Myrddraalis

Myrddraalis

RC3Welly - 09/03/2012 22:58 - United States

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

799

1 939

Anonymous - 20/10/2009 10:56 - Australia

Today, my house got robbed, while I was upstairs taking a dump. FML

48 238

6 135

Anonymous - 08/10/2009 21:26 - United Kingdom

Today, while driving home from work an old homeless man stepped out on front of my car. As I slammed on the brakes the man threw a bag of poo at my windscreen and shouted "Praise The Lord!" before carrying on as if nothing had happened. FML

47 713

3 451

Bodyshaming

auslander - 12/08/2009 20:13 - Switzerland

Today, as a supervisor at a water park, several clients came up to me and complained about a topless girl in our wave pool. I found the girl, called her out, and politely told her that she was not allowed in the pool without a top. "She" was a fat 15 year-old boy. FML

58 796

7 935

webperson04 - 27/07/2009 19:07 - United States

Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML

68 442

3 613