•
•
•

hitmanoo

0

1

16

40

2028

7

Hitmanoo

Hitmanoo -

Exaspera

Hitmanoo -

Hitmanoo

lovers5201

kalonji

MarionDumo...

BadAtPuns

laughaturf...

my2centswo...

paflepanne...

Exaspera

thekoneko

BoneCollec...

mas12806

LyonDetren...

MarionDumo...

Exaspera

BoneCollec...

AirBusDriv...

Hitmanoo

Hitmanoo

Anonymous - 12/12/2009 01:03 - United States

Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML

14 973

42 076

It's only rock n roll

Festivaler - 13/07/2013 07:14 - United Kingdom - Edinburgh

Today, I was at a music festival, and my mum had told me not to to drink. Someone threw a cup of beer at me, and I was worried about smelling of alcohol. It's okay though, because a second cup of urine took the alcohol smell right away. FML

53 223

4 442

phatdaddy62 - 18/02/2013 17:23 - United States

Today, my wife mentioned that she wanted to give me a three-way. I was ecstatic, until she opened her right hand, only to reveal a 3-way lightbulb. FML

18 819

42 551

phatdaddy62

phatdaddy62 23

mardi 19 février 2013 3:31

Im a criminal defense and divorce lawyer. That prank might not have desirable results!

Anonymous - 09/02/2013 20:03 - United States - Chula Vista

Today, I gave my 5-year-old daughter a unicorn pillow pet. She ended up giving him an ill-advised name, and has been loudly proclaiming to everyone she sees that her pillow pet is Horny. FML

36 916

4 925

loves the smell of burning flesh - 01/11/2011 13:22 - United States

Today, I drove past a fragrant steakhouse and my mouth began to water and my stomach started rumbling, which would've been perfectly fine if it wasn't for the fact that I'm a vegan and an animal lover. My confused body craves burning flesh. FML

14 682

62 843