Username - 13/04/2011 07:05 Today, I got attacked by my own dog. I don't know what will be harder, telling everyone how my dog thought I was a robber or explaining to them why a 25 year old man owns a poodle. FML 27 328 16 498
Anonymous - 13/04/2011 02:20 Today, I watched my dog chase his tail for ten minutes, thinking "wow, dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized that I'd been watching my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes. FML 20 651 41 004
sadcase - 12/04/2011 14:01 - Australia Today, I used my hair straightener to attempt to straighten my eyelashes and burned my eyelid. I don't know what's sadder, that fact I thought it would be fun, or that I was stupid enough to think I wouldn't hurt myself. FML 13 261 138 853
anon - 12/04/2011 10:09 Today, I wore a Stanford college T-shirt to school. My Spanish teacher took one look at it and said "You wish". FML 38 358 8 335
hopeless - 08/04/2011 15:03 Today, is my birthday. Everyone forgot except my stalker. He rang the door bell the second it turned 12:00. FML 47 586 4 003