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Username - 23/08/2011 15:55 - United States

Today, I asked my two children why they smelled like pee after we had gotten lunch at McDonald's. They told me that they were playing in the puddles in the play-place. FML

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Lorus - 23/08/2011 07:30 - United States

Today, I passed a kidney stone. This is the third one in two years. I'm only 23. FML

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Sally - 22/08/2011 00:17 - United States

Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML

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kykynevs - 23/08/2011 07:14 - United States

Today, while at the grocery store an elderly woman farted very loudly next to me. Everyone in the aisle looked our way. The woman pointed at me, and left the aisle. I received many disgusted looks from children and their parents. FML

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vishuzzbabe77 - 22/08/2011 06:04 - United States

Today, I bought a Halloween costume for my cat. FML

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