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Time to go fight in the skeleton war!!

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lectro - 23/11/2008 08:22 - France

Today, I swallowed the piercing that I had bought for my tongue yesterday. FML

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Anonymous - 06/07/2014 18:06 - United States - Monterey Park

Today, I went on a job interview. The interviewer said it all went well, but he can't hire me because I've got a nose piercing, and that type of "image" isn't the kind they're looking for in their employees. This is the guy who had a full sleeve tattoo. FML

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Founding father

YouAssholes - - United States - Anaheim

Today, my band members and I were brainstorming ideas to help increase our fanbase. My drummer suggested they replace me for someone attractive. Everyone agreed and now they're trying to kick me out of the band I started. FML

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justgivemethed - 25/04/2013 07:55 - United States - Westminster

Today, I was tutoring a band member. Whenever I ask him to play a D or any D scale, he stops just to snicker and say, "Ha ha. D." He still sucks. I hate his guts. FML

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for fuck sake dad - 02/11/2012 23:50 - Ireland - Limerick

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad looked at him and said, "Nice outfit, but it's a little late for Halloween." Before I could intervene, my boyfriend said that joke had been done to death, to which my dad retorted, "Yeah, so has your mum." Instant fistfight. FML

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