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realitybites - 08/07/2013 17:03 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, while at the doctor's, a week overdue with my first child, I was told that sex and orgasms can sometimes help to induce labor. On the way home, my boyfriend asked for road head, arguing that "She said that stuff about orgasms." Not you, honey. FML

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datgirl92 - 24/05/2013 14:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my friends and I were talking about the creepy stranger that used to stalk me back in high school. I guess his looks changed a lot through the years because I found out that he's my current boyfriend of four months. FML

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Sir_ND_Pity - 11/03/2013 19:57 - United States - Fresno

Today, since I hadn't eaten and was about to have a three hour class, I bought Panda Express. I sat opposite my classroom to eat. Soon after I started eating, a wad of saliva dropped into my bowl, and I heard someone yell "BONUS POINTS!" from the second floor. FML

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mardi 12 mars 2013 1:18

I know the wording makes it a bit confusing, but, yes, someone somehow spit into my bowl from the second floor :-/ unfortunately, I didn't see who did it so I wasn't able to even so much as confront them about it. I guess you could say I'm an unfortunate cookie!