penpal33

2394

London, UK
43
Thursday 10 June 1982

Penpal33

Love to Enjoy Life

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Penpal33

smashed - 24/09/2012 14:33 - United States

Today, I bought my nephew some giant green Incredible Hulk fists for his birthday. He thanked me by Hulk-smashing me in the nuts. FML

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Dickhead - 25/11/2011 15:02 - Lebanon

Today, I found a condom on my bed with a note written by my girlfriend that said, "Since you started acting like a dick, you might as well dress like one." FML

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Effective

Nublet - - United States

Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob. It gave him a panic attack. FML

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Fond memories

-_- - 13/08/2011 00:05 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. I went down on him, only for him to burst into tears halfway through. Apparently, I do it just like his long-lost teen sweetheart did. I swear I could feel him go completely limp in my mouth. FML

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lendahandmanda - 24/02/2010 00:01 - United States

Today, I drunkenly hooked up with my friend's cousin. After trying to stick his finger up my butt, he blacked out on top of me with his penis still hard inside me. I tried yelling his name and pushing him off, with no success. I ended up having to call my friend to help me. FML

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lendahandmanda

lendahandmanda 0

mercredi 24 février 2010 22:14

Not only was he a pretty muscular guy, but his arms were pinning mine down to a point, and i had no leverage laying in the position I was in. To those of you saying I should have just waited til he woke up, he was sort of choking me, his head was under my chin pressed against my neck, and I felt like I was being suffocated, and his body on top of mine was making it difficult for me to breathe. It might have just been anxiety though. I probably could have stuck through it.